{"id":1686,"date":"2009-03-26T16:10:10","date_gmt":"2009-03-26T16:10:10","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/bensettle.com\/blog\/?p=1686"},"modified":"2009-03-26T16:10:10","modified_gmt":"2009-03-26T16:10:10","slug":"encyclopedia-of-marketing-monsters","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bensettle.com\/blog\/encyclopedia-of-marketing-monsters\/","title":{"rendered":"Encyclopedia Of Marketing Monsters"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Got this <em>bizarre<\/em> book at the library yesterday called:<\/p>\n<p><strong><\/p>\n<div style=\"text-align: center;\">&#8220;The Encyclopedia Of Monsters&#8221;<\/div>\n<p><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>VERY cool book.<\/p>\n<p>It&#8217;s a HUGE alphabetical listing of every monster from every book, movie, TV show, myth, legend and comic book you can think of &#8212; from the &#8220;Acromegalic&#8221; (whatever that is) to the &#8220;Zombie Legion.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Anyway, reading it got me thinking about <em>real life<\/em> monsters.<\/p>\n<p>You know, the kind we see in the <strong>**marketing**<\/strong> world.<\/p>\n<p>Except our monsters are actually <em>scarier<\/em>.<\/p>\n<p>And while they don&#8217;t kill you physically&#8230; they can kill you financially.<\/p>\n<p>Here are a few of the nastier ones out to watch out for:<\/p>\n<p><strong>Hydra of Hype:<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>You often see this giant, dragon-like thing with multiple heads in highly competitive niches &#8212; like wate loss, biz opp, work-at-home, etc.<\/p>\n<p>And each time the law cuts one of its heads off, a new, even <strong>MORE<\/strong> hypey head re-grows in its place &#8212; breathing even MORE fiery hype, screaming headlines and exaggerated claims they can&#8217;t back up.  <\/p>\n<p>The law cannot slay this beast because of its regrowing heads.<\/p>\n<p>However, it&#8217;s easily avoided.<\/p>\n<p>As you can always <em>hear<\/em> it coming a mile away.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Lying Leviathan<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>This monster has razor-sharp teeth and his scales are impervious to arrows, swords and (unfortunately) reason &#038; decency.<\/p>\n<p>He likes to lurk in the ocean, sneaking up on unsuspecting consumers who wouldn&#8217;t believe in a million years he would have the gall to blatantly lie through his knife-like teeth the way he does.<\/p>\n<p>And he has no problem gobbling up your money in exchange for products and services that don&#8217;t deliver.<\/p>\n<p>Luckily, others who&#8217;ve seen him will often <em>warn<\/em> you in advance.<\/p>\n<p>Pay attention to your fellow travelers and you can avoid the lying leviathan&#8217;s favorite feeding grounds.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Creature From The Broke Lagoon<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>This thing is slippery like a fish and is hard to catch.<\/p>\n<p>He likes to swim around forums, blogs and anywhere else he can parrot bad advice that&#8217;ll keep you broke.<\/p>\n<p>The difference between him and the other monsters is this creature doesn&#8217;t KNOW he&#8217;s doing bad.<\/p>\n<p><strong>In fact, he thinks he&#8217;s doing GOOD.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>He thinks his half-baked advice based on theories and hearsay work &#8212; even though they have never worked for HIM.<\/p>\n<p>But since he needs to survive, he tries to sell it to others.<\/p>\n<p>Usually as an affiliate for something he&#8217;s never used.<\/p>\n<p>Stay away from his swamps &#8212; like forums &#8212; and you&#8217;re safe.<\/p>\n<p><strong>The Swipe &#038; Steal Slime <\/strong><\/p>\n<p>This shapeless mass of goo (roo) oozes around the Internet &#8212; absorbing everyone else&#8217;s ideas, ads, and sales letters.<\/p>\n<p>And then, when he wants to pitch something, shamelessly takes whatever he&#8217;s absorbed and uses it as his (or her &#8212; there are female swipe &#038; steal slimes, too) own.<\/p>\n<p>There&#8217;s not much you can do about these monsters.<\/p>\n<p>They&#8217;re impossible to catch since they have no real &#8220;substance&#8221;.<\/p>\n<p>But it&#8217;s good to be aware of them.<\/p>\n<p>And not to let them absorb <strong>YOU<\/strong> and make you a blob like <em>them<\/em>.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Manipulation Zombies<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>On the surface, these pitiful undead things LOOK normal.<\/p>\n<p>But look closely, and you see they have no conscience.  <\/p>\n<p>No feeling.  <\/p>\n<p>No caring about anyone or anything (not even <em>themselves<\/em>).<\/p>\n<p>And so they use manipulation, tricks and &#8220;black hat&#8221; tactics all day long.<\/p>\n<p>They don&#8217;t know any other way.<\/p>\n<p>Lying, cheating, and milking you of every last cent you own is as easy and &#8220;routine&#8221; for these monsters as you and I ordering a hamburger at <em>McDonalds<\/em>.<\/p>\n<p><strong>And they are VERY good at what they do.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>So good in fact, other marketers (especially those just starting out) are tempted to emulate their wicked ways.<\/p>\n<p>Don&#8217;t do it.<\/p>\n<p>It will take you down a path from which you may never return.<\/p>\n<p>Anyway, those are a few marketing monsters to watch for.<\/p>\n<p>They are all over the place &#8212; especially on the Internet.<\/p>\n<p>Watch your azz.<\/p>\n<p>Ben Settle<\/p>\n<p><strong>P.S.<\/strong> The best <strong>DEFENSE<\/strong> against these monsters is a good <strong>OFFENSE<\/strong>. <strong><a href=\"http:\/\/www.CopywritingGrabBag.com\">The Copywriting Grab Bag<\/a><\/strong> contains over 122 different &#8220;weapons&#8221; that can help you defeat any of the monsters in the business arena &#8212; and save your fellow country folk from their terrible ways.<\/p>\n<p>You can &#8220;grab&#8221; it now at:<\/p>\n<p><strong><\/p>\n<div style=\"text-align: center;\"><a href=\"http:\/\/www.CopywritingGrabBag.com\">www.CopywritingGrabBag.com<\/a><\/div>\n<p><\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Got this bizarre book at the library yesterday called: &#8220;The Encyclopedia Of Monsters&#8221; VERY cool book. It&#8217;s a HUGE alphabetical listing of every monster from every book, movie, TV show, myth, legend and comic book you can think of &#8212; from the &#8220;Acromegalic&#8221; (whatever that is) to the &#8220;Zombie Legion.&#8221; Anyway, reading it got me [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[8,14],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1686","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","category-copywriting-and-sales-letters","category-sales-marketing"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/bensettle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1686","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/bensettle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/bensettle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bensettle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bensettle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1686"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/bensettle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1686\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/bensettle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1686"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bensettle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1686"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bensettle.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1686"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}