One of my favorite scenes from “The Two Towers” movie is when the Riders of Rohan slaughter an orc party, and then put one of the orc heads on display to frighten off the other orcs in the area.
It was an early inspiration for what I teach in my “Copy Troll” book.
But, it’s also useful for frightening off people who should not be buying what I offer. By displaying their antics, it scares these other “orc” customers off, and lets the ideal customers I want know it’s safe to enter my lush green lands.
Case in point:
If you’ve read my last few days’ emails, and want to see a perfect example of someone who is a magnificent example of:
1. A new product junkie…
2. A hyper “S” personality…
3. A small thinker in info-marketing…
Look no further than a bloke who I broke my own rule (proving even I have to keep any tendency to be “nice” in check…) with, and let resubscribe to get the April “Email Players” issue last month.
Predictably, he gave the same sob sister story others do to be allowed back.
And, also predictably, he did not like the April issue.
The reason?
“There was 6 pages of adverts and 10 pages telling me what not to do. I just expected more – I don’t think I benefited from the issue so I’m sorry to say that I can’t continue.”
Despite his fuzzy math — there was 17 pages of content, more content than the usual 16 pages, and only 4 pages of advertising – it’s been quite useful.
Why?
Two main reasons:
1. Amusement
An info-marketer complaining about seeing (oh noes!) ads that can be studied in an info product is rather like a direct mail writer complaining about seeing direct mail in his mailbox.
It borders on marketing insanity.
But, it’s an *amusing* kind of insanity.
Like when the Joker told the story about the two escaped mental patients on a roof top.
And the one with a flashlight says:
“I’ll shine this light across to the other roof and you walk on it to get to the other side.”
And the other one says:
“Do you think I’m CRAZY? You’ll turn it off when I’m half way across!”
2. A head to display
Even better… it gave me a perfect orc head to display, to keep the rest of the new product junkie orcs away from even thinking something like “Email Players” might be a good idea to invest in.
So if you think like the guy above, consider this email the proverbial orc head staring at you:
Save your money, Chuckles.
I promise you will be better off.
And this is especially true in the paid newsletter henceforth — where there will be lots MORE ads, to the tune of, eventually, if the demand is there, as many as 7 full pages of ads combined (even more than the new product junkie above’s mythical 6 pages in the April issue) — embedded within and as loose leaf inserts. Ads that a small thinking new product junkies will no-doubt be horrified by:
“I’m paying for this – how dare he include these ads!”
… even as they get up-sold on everything else they pay far more for in life — from pricey restaurants, to hospital visits, to new cars, to warranties, to an extra shot of sugar in their coffee, to even buying domain names.
But forward-thinking types?
They will see those ads as the bonus “back door swipe file” it is.
Complete with special offers nobody else outside Email Players are privy to… and, even if they don’t buy from them or have any interest in them, are worth studying.
More reasons for the orcs to scurry back to their caves:
The future of “Email Players” will also be far more akin to the kind of deeper thinking info found in the April issue — which, I even predicted in the first email I used to promote it in late March, would be the kind of info small thinkers would hate, flee, and be warded off by… while bigger thinking types would love, embrace, and profit like crazy from.
Take, for example, one of Australia’s top copywriters & marketing consultants Pete Godfrey.
Right after he read that issue (which you can no longer get) he hunted me down on Skype and said:
“Ben you legend! Still loving the newsletter mate… please…keep publishing.”
And Blas Carrasco, who said:
“I just finished reading this month’s issue and let me say… For me, it’s the best one yet and I know I’ll lose sleep over it because I have a zillion-frackin things whirling around my noggin now. This issue has come at a perfect time as I’m currently working through a sales page for a product I created.Thanks for a badass newsletter and an insomnia filled night.”
And Ross O’Lochlainn, who said:
“Ben… a quick note to say your latest issue…has been a mind blower. I’ve been thinking about what you said in this issue. A LOT.” [Note: his comment was almost a page long, but it has lots of “spoilers” for that issue, so I omitted…]
And Steve Jolly, who said:
“Best issue in my 4 years of EP. Thank you!”
And, as far as the (gasp!) paid ads I am going to be testing more of inside go… the founding father of internet marketing as we all know it — Ken McCarthy – said this after I told him the secret inspiration and motivations I have behind testing them:
“Brilliant aspiration on so many levels.”
HINT:
It ain’t just about money — I make little money in the short term doing these ads, especially compared to when I stuck a single, long form sales letter for one of my own offers in the envelope each month…
Bottom line:
These guys are playing chess and getting cerebral with their businesses, while the new product junkies drool on the carpet while shooting marbles and singing along with Barney the Dinosaur on tv. And, it’s my goal that this email serves as a warning displayed “head” to these marble-shooters to save their money, save their time, and save their energy… and keep playing in the business equivalent of the bin of sticky balls at Chuck E. Cheeses where they will be more comfortable.
Because, as I show over and over and over… they have no place amongst the EPOTH.
(i.e. the Email Players of the Horde)
But, there is always the possibility of hope, for those few orcs with the desire to change their wicked ways.
I say “possiblity” because it’s all up to you.
I can show you my version of the 12-step program.
But you have to follow it, endure the withdrawals for when you crave something new instead of implementing what you have, and change the way you think long term, and make it a part of your “business lifestyle” — and not just a one-time quick fix for your latest new product craving.
And lest someone head to social media to say how “mean” I am:
The Riders of Rohan didn’t particularly *like* slaughtering orcs & displaying their heads.
But, it was necessary.
Not just for the safety of their lands.
But, also, for the safety of the rest of the orcs, too.
And so it is when I write emails to ward off the new product junkies, freebie-seekers, and shallow-thinkers wandering the goo-roo casino. They are probably far better off downloading another free eBook or mindlessly reacting to their social media feeds than hanging around here being pitched every day.
Marbles, after all, are cheap.
But learning from, buying, and implementing my newsletter ain’t…
For anyone still reading this long email who is interested in “Email Players”…
The deadline to get the May issue is Tuesday.
Here is the link:
Ben Settle
