Cardinal “Email Players” rule:
Never, ever kiss a snowflake’s bootay or even allow them to stay on your list. Let them haunt the needy marketers who will tolerate it. Especially if they take the attitude where they think they are special just because they opted in as if they did you a favor.
(They haven’t).
Lemme see if I can’t entertain you a bit with an example.
Below’s an exchange with a snowflake from an email from last week.
I was trying to draw the evil out of her for email fodder.
(Tried egging her on more hoping for more of a reaction because, yes, I’m evil like that, daddy likes his fodder…)
SUBSCRIBER: I am sorry but I miss the point of this email- is there one? If there is not point I will unsubscribe. So until I hear back with some feasible explanation- your hanging in a delicate balance
elBENBO: already opted you out, you’re dismissed.
SUBSCRIBER: Wow. I really missed something. I am a new follower and you came highly recommended… Lol well I guess you go against tradition and everything taught by others. Okay have a great night. Ps no one Fucking dismisses me. Wow
elBENBO: First time for everything, Pumpkin. Good luck.
Do people over 13 years old still end online rants with “wow?”
In any case:
It’s almost more fun melting snowflakes like this than it is making sales…
To answer her question:
Yes, my ways go against tradition — especially the “customer is always right” shtick. I don’t believe in it at all. It’s the essence of my wicked ways. And, it works. (Yes, even in *your* market — not putting up with someone’s bullshyt works universally.)
The September issue goes to print in a few days.
To get it in time, hop, skip, and leap over here:
Ben Settle
