Ben Settle

Back in the late 90’s when I graduated college I immediately joined an mlm via a Kevin Trudeau (the guy in prison) infomercial. And, since I was in his downline I regularly got tapes each month of his motivational talks.

Most were actually pretty good.

He was a natural at that.

(And should have stuck with it.)

Anyway, one of the tapes I remember most was titled “Don’t Let Anyone Steal Your Dreams.” It was all about the so-called “dream stealers” out there — family, friends, co-workers, your big mouthed brother in law, bosses, and the list goes on.

People always trying to get you to give up and be miserable like them.

I could relate.

Had quite a few of ‘em in my life, too, laughing at my ambitions.

(Who’s laughing now, jackasses?)

It was a good tape for those long profit-less nights.

All of which got me to thinking recently.

You have a lot of “stealers” out there online, too. Including dream stealers (like the ones above), motivation stealers (like a comfortable job that pays just enough to keep you fat and happy), ambition stealers (like significant others who try to hoard all your time while you’re pursuing your goals), hard work stealers (like pretty much anyone hawking make muney on line by being lazy and without work products), common sense stealers (like IM gurus pushing complicated or backasswards theories like good will emails, etc).

All of these stealers be bad.

But, there is one GOOD kind of stealer out there.

And, I profess to be one:

“The excuse stealer”

Someone was telling me recently the reason I get a lot of people, uhm, displeased with me… is because I call them out on their bullshyt excuses. Take yesterday’s email about price never being the reason not to buy. People who carry the price excuse around like a child carries a safety banky around get very cranky when they hear that.

Same with any other excuses I see.

I call ‘em out.

I take an almost sadistic glee in doing so, too.

And you know what?

It ain’t gonna stop any time soon.

Anyway, hopefully you saw the big lesson here.

I’m not going to spell it out for you. In fact, I am hoping some loser who clings to their excuses complains that I didn’t give any “value” in this. Will make great fodder…

Onward to business:

The September “Email Players” issue deadline looms.

One of the tips inside is what I call the “severed-ear-in-the-forest” secret for making it near impossible for people to ignore your emails — yes, even if they hate your guts for stealing their excuses every day.

To get this issue in time go here today:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

I got inspired to watch one of my favorite movies again recently:

(yes I wrote about this not too long ago)

“The Wolf Of Wall Street”

And, while watching the scene where Jordan Belfort is training his rag-tag team of new salesmen there was something he said that can put a lot more sales (ethically, not the way he did it) in your hot, sticky little piggy bank using email. He was talking about objections people would have to buying their shady stocks.

His answer:

“The only real objection they have is they don’t trust you guys. And why should they trust you? I mean look at you, you’re a bunch of sleazy salesman right?!  So what do you say?”

Ah yes, the big question.

How do you get people to trust your righteous self?

Well, I have long believed that in emails, you shouldn’t have any objections or trust issues because you should be wise enough not to create them in the first place like most people do. What I mean by that is, coming out swinging pitching with benefits, claims, promises, etc.

All that does is create objections that you have to deal with.

What’s better?

Creating a rock-solid personal brand people either love or hate *before* they see anything to buy from you.

Meaning, if you have an offer someone wants, they already trust you.

You don’t have to goose around with manipulation tactics.

If you want to learn how to build a personal brand that is so strong people buy from you sight unseen, because they feel they truly know you (and in a way, they do, even if you’ve never met), and are 100% secure buying from you, even if you make claims that are hard to believe… then the best personal branders to study are NOT people on social media.

They’re good for a few laughs, maybe.

But, that’s about all.

No, study people who have world famous personal brands:

• Walt Disney

• Oprah Winfrey

• Dr. Atkins

• Stephen King

• Thomas Kincaid (the painter)

• Dennis Rodman

• Hillary (and Bill) Clinton

• Donald Trump

• And, yes, my pal Jesus Christ.

You don’t have to *like* any of them.

You might even be given to hating some of them.

(I think a few of the above are giant turds, personally.)

But, chances are, hearing their names triggers an instant “ooh yeah!” or a “ugh, I can’t stand that person!” which is exactly how you know you have a strong personal brand. A brand you can get very quickly by, you guessed it, using email marketing.

Specifically, the way I teach in the September “Email Players” issue.

I show you how to use the above peoples’ branding principles in email.

It’s mucho powerful information.

But, there’s nothing fancy about it.

Nothing sexy, either.

It’s simply based on sound principled thought and the laws of human behavior.

Something lacking big time in the Internet marketing world.

Anyway, she goes to the printer soon.

Hop on the train her to get it in time:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

Something must have been in the water last week.

Multiple people wrote me telling me how much they wish they could join “Email Players” and learn how to write emails people look forward to reading and buying from but, you know, they couldn’t afford it.

Sigh.

I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again:

It’s never the money.

Ever.

It’s about priorities.

It’s $3.23 per day.

People piss that out in Star-shmucks coffee each day.

And if you *really* think you can’t afford it, but insist you *really* want it, then here is all you do:

1. Cancel your cable/satellite TV

2. Stop eating out

Yes, it really is that simple.

For 99% of Americans at least, that would do the trick. And if the above still wouldn’t work for you… if you are so broke you’re living in a box on the street somewhere… then starting a biz’nid should be the last thing on your mind.

Get a job, Hoss, get your house in order.

Otherwise, don’t expect me to believe the “I can’t afford it” shtick.

You can, you just won’t.

And, realize the first step towards success is to stop lying to yourself.

All right.

Enough of this clacking.

If you’re ready to reach deep into your pockets to invest a whopping $3.23 per day, if you’re ready to ditch the excuses, and, even most importantly, if you’re ready to work (and if you’re not, please, don’t waste your money or time, only losers think they can get anything done without putting in the work — and we don’t cotton to losers ‘round here in elBenbo’s Lair), then here’s where to subscribe:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Next issue goes out in about a week.

Hurry if you want it in time…

Ben Settle

An ex-spurt on social media (where else?) says about email frequency:

“No more than 2 (maybe 3) a week or I’ll unsubscribe fast. It comes across as desperate and too in-your-face in my opinion. #EmailChat”

Sigh.

Do people actually still believe this nonsense?

Once again, elBenbo has to get off his lazy bootay, get his lumberjack outfit on, and start chopping away all this misinformation using his righteous battle axe.

Actually, forget about that for a second.

I’m going to remain silent on this.

Instead, I’ll let one of the greatest ad men who ever lived Mr. Bruce Barton get this. Once upon a time, back when ol’ BB (who is the second “B” in the great BBDO ad agency, not exactly a social media queen, but still, he was pretty smart…) was doing radio addresses he told the story about Joseph and when he was second in command (only to Pharaoh himself) in Egypt.

What happened was this:

Joseph was “it.”

The head guy in charge.

Only the king was above him.

And, everyone knew who he was, submitted to him, and basically treated him like royalty — known about far and wide. A true “rock star” (using today’s goo-roo fanboy vernacular) through and through.

Nobody dared cross him.

Every single citizen knew who he was and loved him.

And, there was peace…

Then, Joseph croaked and joined the choir invisible. And, according to the great book of Exodus, it wasn’t all that long after that when a new king arose in Egypt “who knew Joseph not”, and all that prestige, respect, and world class branding vanished like a fart in the wind.

Bam!

And, not long after that, Joseph’s entire family was enslaved!

That’s how fleeting a brand can be eliminated.

Anyway, Barton’s point?

Every day in the marketplace, new kings are arising, and unless you let them know how you da man day in, and day out, it won’t be long before they know you not, either, my little droogie.

So there you go.

Don’t let the new kings forget you.

Email every day.

Send them something they want to read and buy from.

And then, like during Joseph’s reign… there will be peace.

(For you and your happy customers.)

To learn my arcane email methods, so you can stay in front of your list day in an day out… without excuse, apology, or sounding like some kind of needy newbie who just got started in the make muney online niche (even though they haven’t made any muney online themselves), check out my “Email Players” newsletter.

It’ll set you straight.

And, you’ll wonder how you ever did biz’nid any other way.

The September issue goes to the printer soon.

Subscribeth ye here to getteth in time:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

Re: Last Sunday’s email

(Subject line was “ol’ blue balls elBenbo”)

Reader Irfan Merchant replies with:

Google is reporting a huge surge in search for the keyword “blue balls”.

Feeling happy for all the GFs who will read, say awwww and then proceed to make guys happy, at last.
Turns out, you are solving complex relationship issues with a marketing email.

Genius !

Email Marketing just works….

That’s what Yours Unruly does ’round here:

Saves the world (financial, business, and, yes, relationships) one email at a time.

It’s a (mostly) thankless job.

But, someone’s gotta do it…

Speaking of jobs:

The next “Email Players” issue has a bonus lesson featuring an extremely powerful email teaching from the great and esteemed Tellman Knudson — who I have been a fan of lo’ these many years, and had a chance to rap with him at a seminar back in April. He has figured out a way to do something the giant ad agency Leo Burnett has been doing for decades to create some of the most well-recognized brands in history and drive sales up through the roof for products that would be considered “commodities” and flat out boring.
Just imagine doing it with your righteous product…

Anyway, she’s going to the printer soon.

If you want in before it does, hop your bad self over here:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

One of my favorite novels is Charles Bukowski’s:

“Women”

I’ve written about this book before — about a butt-ugly, alcoholic poet and writer in his 50’s and his adventures with a string of women who suddenly start floating into his life.

Really, it has no plot.

It’s just one adventure with a different woman after another.

But, there are certain characteristics (his desire to be left alone, introverted, enjoys his own company or hanging with just one person over the company of a bunch of people, etc) I share with the character Henry Chinaski (which is really just Charles Bukowski — it’s autobiographical) that make it so entertaining for me I’m on my 3rd read of it now and enjoying it even more than the first two times.

One of my favorite quotes is:

“The worst thing for a writer is to know another writer, and worse than that, to know a number of other writers. Like flies on the same turd.”

(I have found this particularly true amongst copywriters at times.)

And, another, that I just picked up on yesterday while reading it is:

“There’s no way I can stop writing, it’s a form of insanity.

The more I write, the more I realize how true that is.

No sane person thinks the way those of us who write every. single. day. do. The best writers (whether copywriters, email writers, bloggers, novelists, etc) all seem to have traits that make regular civilians (i.e. non writers) think we are a tad insane.

And you know what?

If someone casts elBenbo as an insane villain, then I’m gonna play the part well.

And, I do it by writing more.

More emails.

More copy.

More fiction.

More posts in my private Facebook group.

And the list goes on.

I’d rather be insane than boring and non-productive, just sitting around all day watching the telly, obsessed with the latest riots or race baiting on the shnooze, or, even worse, floating around with no mission or agenda in life, just existing (as the late Earl Nightingale said), like a starfish or amoeba.

Screw that sideways.

Writing THIS email has been immensely fun for me.

I had to write it.

That’s how my email methodology works.

I don’t teach hard writing.

I teach fun writing.

And, also, profitable writing.

If you want to tap into your inner insanity, you can join me and my fellow insane Email Players droogies here:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

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One of my favorite novels is Charles Bukowski’s:

“Women”

I’ve written about this book before — about a butt-ugly, alcoholic poet and writer in his 50’s and his adventures with a string of women who suddenly start floating into his life.

Really, it has no plot.

It’s just one adventure with a different woman after another.

But, there are certain characteristics (his desire to be left alone, introverted, enjoys his own company or hanging with just one person over the company of a bunch of people, etc) I share with the character Henry Chinaski (which is really just Charles Bukowski — it’s autobiographical) that make it so entertaining for me I’m on my 3rd read of it now and enjoying it even more than the first two times.

One of my favorite quotes is:

“The worst thing for a writer is to know another writer, and worse than that, to know a number of other writers. Like flies on the same turd.”

(I have found this particularly true amongst copywriters at times.)

And, another, that I just picked up on yesterday while reading it is:

“There’s no way I can stop writing, it’s a form of insanity.

The more I write, the more I realize how true that is.

No sane person think the way those of us who write every. single. day. does.

The best writers (whether copywriters, email writers, bloggers, novelists, etc) all seem to have traits that make regular civilians (i.e. non writers) think we are a tad insane.

And you know what?

If someone casts elBenbo as a villain, then I’m gonna play the part well.

And, I do it by writing more.

More emails.

More copy.

More fiction.

More posts in my private Facebook group.

And the list goes on.

I’d rather be insane than boring and non-productive, just sitting around all day watching the telly, obsessed with the latest riots or race baiting on the shnooze, or, even worse, floating around with no mission or agenda in life, just existing (as the late Earl Nightingale said), like a starfish or amoeba.

Screw that sideways.

Writing THIS email has been immensely fun for me.

I had to write it.

That’s how my email methodology works.

I don’t teach hard writing.

I teach fun writing.

And, also, profitable writing.

If you want to tap into your inner insanity, you can join me and my fellow insane Email Players droogies here:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

I got an email yesterday from a bloke wanting me to talk more about “writing” and not so much mindset, marketing, persuasion, selling, yada yada yada.

Sigh.

As you wish, my little fledgling.

Here are some not-so-interesting (and kinda weird) writing habits I have.

Your milage may vary using them.

So, do with this info what you will:

• I write my novels in bed

• I often listen to the same song on a continuous loop while writing

• I think way faster than I can type so my first drafts (of any writing — novels, emails, sales letters, and on on, and so forth) are unreadable and unintelligible to anyone but me

• I’m paranoid about boring people

• I’m even more paranoid about boring myself

• I can write okay but I suck at spelling so I don’t worry about spelling words

• I can speak okay but suck at pronunciation so I don’t worry about how I’m pronouncing words

• To motivate myself I simply remember 99% of people aren’t willing to write an email designed to sell their product every day — they could if they wanted to (lame excuses notwithstanding), but they won’t, so there really is no competition

• I am not afraid to use the pronoun “I” in my emails and copy…

That’s it for today.

To learn my wicked email ways, go here:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

It astounds me how many people resist my “pay yourself first” philosophy in terms of time.

(i.e. first hour of every day belongs to you — not clients, boss, etc)

But, it works.

And, no, it doesn’t just work for Yours Unruly.

The ever-persistent Ashley Gainer Lankford comments:

“When I was drowning as a single mom trying to freelance “around the baby” I took your advice to do my own business-building before anything else…and by the end of that year I’d tripled my monthly income. It’s what I tell all my freelancing moms now, but the resistance is a real beast. I get it, having lived in panic mode for a while. It’s hard to choose marketing over client work when all you can think about is whether or not you’ll have enough money to pay rent next week.”

What else need be said?

It works.

If your rationalization hamster is already spinning out a bevy of “I can’t because…” excuses, simply swap out “can’t” with “won’t” and at least you’ll know the only one in your way is you.

What’s not in your wallet?

Of course, I think the first hour should go to writing an email selling your product.

Want to revolutionize your sales?

Your profits?

Your lifestyle?

Start writing one email each morning (no skipping days) using my wicked ways, and assuming you have an offer people want, I don’t see how you can possibly not become more successful.

More info here:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle