Ben Settle

I never brag or boast in my emails.

(hah — just kidding, it’s opposite day…)

But, here’s a few words from the brilliant “A-list” direct response designer Lori Haller — her design work has helped win major controls for guys like Clayton Makepeace, Gary Bencivenga, the late Jim Rutz (3 of the best copywriters who ever lived, in case you be an Internet-only bloke), and other world class writers. I remember even hearing Clayton (at AWAI’s event a few months ago) say don’t even bother hiring anyone else.

i.e. she’s the real deal.

Anyway, she says:

“I read and study every single one of [Your] emails. AND YOU are one of the only people, Ben, who touches the true PULSE of what is realllllly going on today. PERIOD. Everyone else is mostly a copycat and saying the same old thing (read SHIT). DRONES. WANNABEEEES….. YES-MEN. (BTW: YES-MEN SUCK) YOU are fresh, new, just twisted enough and seriously on point. **** TRUTH: I wake up to READ YOUR WORDS. I learn from you and study exactly how you combine words + feelings together. Like no other. YOU go DEEP and HARD.”

Word up.

Anyway, lest you think there isn’t value to you in this:

Notice the lack of bull shyt in her testimonial?

The lack of hype?

The lack of anything even remotely sounding like a canned testimonial?

This is how I like it.

Off the cuff, from the gut, and from the heart.

When you go for testimonials, *that* is the sweet spot.

And you know what else?

If you want a template for how to use testimonials in emails, stretch out thy greedy little fingers and subscribe to “Email Players” — the upcoming July issue has a testimonial email template I shared with my podcast email writer and announcer babe Misty (i.e. something I normally only share with my inner circle of people).

But, don’t expect anything sexy or “ninja.”

It’s based on pure simplicity.

And, that’s why it works so well.

Subscribe here before it goes to the printer this week:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

Let’s talk about the late actor Steve McQueen and your emails.

In his first TV gig he played an old west bounty hunter, and was the biggest pain in the ass anyone had ever dealt with. On his first day *alone* he fired two stunt men (I don’t even think he had that authority, but he did it anyway). He routinely threw out scripts if they were weak or weren’t true to the character. And, he argued with directors and producers on a nearly daily basis.

The result?

What all those people admit was a far more successful show.

(Even the people who hated him admitted it.)

More:

There was something else he did, though, that frustrated the writers.

And that was, he could “say” more with just a look into the camera than 2-3 pages of dialogue said. With just a twitch of his facial expression or a glare of his eye, he communicated far more to the audience than all these professional screenwriters could with a dozen lines of talking.

And guess ye what?

There’s actually a way to adapt this “McQueen Method” to your emails.

Something you hardly ever see anyone talk about.

But, it works like crazy to get people reading and clicking.

And guess ye what?

I show you this method in the July “Email Players” issue.

She goes to the printer early next week.

Saddle up that high horse of yours and gallop over yonder to get it in time here:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

Copywriter Shawn LeBrun wrote some nice things about your pal elBenbo recently in one of the facebook groups. Basically, he said he used some tactics I teach to write an email for a new client. The client paid him $100 to write that email. And, in (literally) less than an hour later, the client messaged him saying they had already made $400 in sales in that time.

Then, two hours later, they were up to $800 in sales.

Five hours after that they were over $1,361 in sales.

They ended closing out that day with $2,000 in sales.

As Shawn put it:

“…these may seem like small numbers, but a 1200% return on investment is pretty good no matter how you dice it. Again, he invested $100 per day for one of my emails. And he’s going to close out today close to $2,000 in sales. Not a bad return. The bottom line? Email daily, write with curiosity subjects and infotaining content like Ben says, and oh yeah…. get any training you can from Ben. Your clients will love you”

^^ True.

Here’s something else that’s true:

I have noticed over the years (and this is especially true of newer copywriters who get their clients on flakebook) that copywriters are FAR more concerned with getting props from the client about their work, instead of caring if the market is going to buy or not.

I had a discussion about this recently with someone.

I said, “this copy… it sucks.”

(And it did — no concern from what the *market* would think.)

This person replies with, “well, the client likes it.”

Sigh.

My point?

If you are going to learn my wicked email ways, and are more concerned with what a client thinks (and aren’t prepared to fight to have your emails run) rather than what the market thinks (via them buying or not — and believe ye me, if your copy converts even clients who hated your copy will want to have our babies), don’t bother learning from me.

Go find some facebook fluffpreneur to learn from.

You’ll simply frustrate yourself with my ways.

For example:

The info I teach in the July “Email Players” issue (which helped one person do over $100k in a month where he normally gets *zero* sales) would be balked at by a lot of clients.

They’d be scared to death to do it.

At the very least it’d make most clients nervous.

And, you’d probably have to fight to get it tested.

Anyway, she goes to the printer in just one week.

Get your lovin’ in time here:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

Reader Edgar Rutkis says:

“Not sure if you’ve used this term anywhere. I read about that person who thinks you NEED to keep your podcast free. elBenbo should introduce his arch enemy. A nemesis. He cries about the unconventional marketing ways of elBenbo. His teachings state that ‘[this person] in [this book] once said you should do this only that way and also.. my mum’ says I am greatest’ He goes by the name of elBimbo.”

Heh.

I likey.

It certainly does explain the copycats passing my work off as theirs.

There are also some internal foes inside my psyche:

There is also elBannedbo — which happened to me on Facebook ads.

And elBurnedbo who has gotten himself into bad deals and relationships.

elBrokebo who was the chief personality of my biz for too many years.

And, of course, elBendoverbo — who used to give away all his ideas free to would-be clients and customers, only to find the majority of those clients and customers hiring or buying from someone who knew how to sell.

(Something you won’t ever have to do when you learn my wicked email ways…)

While we’re babbling about names:

(elBabblebo?)

Tellman Knudson taught me a way to profit from all these alter egos I still have not had a chance to implement. I was tempted to use it in *this* email but didn’t want to steal his thunder (plus, it takes a few tweaks in the auto-responder and I am not that motivated to do it today — so sayteth elBumbo).

But, worry ye not:

I’m going to be interviewing him sometime in the upcoming months for “Email Players” subscribers about it. It’s pure genius. And, when I heard him reveal this at an event we both spoke at in April, I was floored.

But, that’s sometime down the line.

In the meantime, check out “Email Players” here:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

A doctor protests yesterday’s “mouth breather” email:

“interesting email. but as a myofunctionally therapist trained person, I must protest the use of the term mouth breather for an online schlub. please look up mouthbreathing and all the health problems associated with it, and realize that myofucntional therapists spend a lot of time trying to help people stop this habit”

Of course, I had to ask:

“Do all myofunctional therapists have trouble reading emails in context or just you”

Sheesh.

The ease at which people are offended is matched only by their refusal to read in context.

And you know what?

If you aren’t careful (and this is especially true of people new to my wicked ways with emails), it’s very easy to start supplicating and apologizing and changing things to appease the whims of the complainers (especially when they are blatantly taking things out of context — and know it), protestors, and other people always looking for a new monster to shriek at.

I can assure if you do, you’ll make less sales.

Get less respect (nobody respects a poosy, oh noes… I just offended someone’s cat AND spelling nazis with that one).

And, just get *more* complaining, protesting, shrieking — as once you apologize for one frivolous offense, the demands for more frivolous apologies will pile up so high you’ll need wings to stay above them.

That’s free advice.

Do with it what ye will.

For the paid email advice, go here:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

Let’s talk about mouth breathers.

It’s a term thrown around a lot.

And, I certainly use it at every opportunity because it amuses me and “says” 2 or 3 pages worth of description, in only two words. For example, when I hear the term (and this is just one example), I can’t help but think of the pathetic schlub who friends random chicks on Facebook and then immediately starts stalking their profile, liking a bunch of their photos and posts that are 3+ years old, followed by a “hi” message with no context, purpose, or reason other than to drool.

Chicks reading this email knoweth of what I speak of.

Ooh yeah, they know.

Social media is like a petri dish of mouth breathing bacteria.

And, I can’t help but feel a tad sorry for these blokes.

(They know not what they do…)

But you know what?

These mouth breathers are actually kinda useful, too.

In fact, I have used a mouth-breather inspired technique to write some of my best email subject lines.

Example?

I’ve got several.

And that, my inquisitive little droogie, is one of the many things I teach in the July “Email Players” issue which goes to the printer in just a couple weeks. Inside, I show you examples of mouth breather subject lines that have (1) gotten the attention of A-list copywriters like Clayton Makepeace (who mentioned one at the AWAI Web Copy Intensive event a few months ago being one of his favorites) and another that… (2) gotten me both lots of sales and lots of new readers who, like the Kramer painting in Seinfeld — were repulsed by them, but couldn’t look away, and kept coming back for more… (and yes, kept buying).

A word of warning though:

It takes balls to use these kinds of subject lines.

But, they can get you lots of attention.

Lots of opens (and clicks).

And, yes, lots of sales.

Anyway, I get freaky about this in the July issue.

Subscribe here today to make sure you get it:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

Recently I have been reading a book about the late John Hughes.

He was the screenwriter and director for some of my favorite movies back in the 80’s and early 90’s. Everyone who knew him in the book I’m reading described him as eccentric, prone to emotional mood swings, brilliant, a genius, and someone who grew tired of hanging out with the liberals in Hollywood before he dropped out of the game altogether to be a recluse with his family until his death in 2009. He wrote tons of movie scripts (and many that were never even made into movies.)

He was a writing machine.

And, I have always loved his movies.

Especially Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, The Breakfast Club. and Home Alone. (The late brilliant copywriter Gene Schwartz said every copywriter should watch Home Alone at least 2 or 3 times, something to think about, my little droogie the next time you’re scrolling through Amazon Prime looking for a movie to watch…)

But you know what my favorite thing about him was?

The thing I did not realize until reading this book?

John Hughes was a speed writer.

Apparently, he would write entire scripts in 24-48 hours!

One story the direct Chris Columbus (guy who directed Home Alone) said was, John Hughes was a night owl. And he had Chris come over one evening only to get an idea and then disappear for the rest of the night while Chris slept on the couch. In the morning, John woke him up having wrote an entire first draft of a movie script.

Now that’s fast!

And, it’s one of the keys to his success:

Fast writing.

Way too many people in copywriting, email, etc spend far too much time writing. They are always trying to get things perfect. Always waiting to be “inspired.” And, always making writing far harder than it needs to be. Screw that sideways. Fast writing is good writing. It’s why my Enoch Wars novels never take me more than 14 days. It’s why some of my highest performing sales letters were banged out in days (sometimes hours) instead of weeks and months. And, it’s why I can easily churn out emails each day to sell my products while the mush cookies are still waiting around trying to get their swans in a row.

And you know what?

Fast writing is easy when you know what you’re doing.

Enter my “Email Players” newsletter.

The first thing you get when you subscribe is my “Email Players Playbook” — which shows you all kinds of ways to write emails, subject lines, content, etc. In fact, new subscriber Josh H. wrote just this weekend:

“Wow, your Email Player Playbook is really eye opening and I can see why this stuff works. I received it a week or two ago and have read it 3 times already. My mind has been filling with all sorts of ideas.”

^^ That’s what I’m talkin’ about.

What about you?

You want to bang out emails like this?

And, have so many ideas writing becomes fast?

Then, check ye out the newsletter here:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

P.S. I timed it, I wrote *this* email in less than 7 minutes.

See?

It works.

Now stop being a donkey and start writing…

“Email Players” subscriber Michael Cheney (one of the founding fathers of IM — selling online since around 1995) who mails his list about 3-4 times per day and has been making a small fortune since doing so, got a strange message over the weekend.

It was from an email ex-spurt.

And, it was giving him some unsolicited advice.

Problem was, the email was written in a strange dialect.

A dialect I have seen many times from fluffpreneurs.

Anyway, below is the email in the strange language the guy wrote.

And, my scholarly translation of it:

“I’ve studied and worked in Internet Marketing for 10 years. Not just the ‘make money online’ niche but pretty much every market and every component. I make a living as a consultant advising businesses, training them and managing marketing plans and traffic campaigns and I charge £1,000’s for doing so.”

elBenbo’s Translation:

“I am the marketing equivalent of a eunuch who gives secks advice.”

---

“So it stuns me that having bought one of your products and attended 1 webinar of the level of activity of your email marketing. It’s completely overwhelming and I can only imagine the unsubscribes that you must get.”

elBenbo’s Translation:

“I don’t play to win, I play to not lose.”

---

“Just a snapshot but there were 5 emails yesterday, 7 emails today so far, and I wouldn’t be surprised if there were yet more to come. I advise businesses to mail 2-3 times a weèk at the most. Quality not quantity. Create and develop an audience that look forward to the next email, not put them in a situation where they wonder which email they should read, if any.”

elBenbo’s Translation:

“I am projecting my frustration with nobody reading my emails onto you.”

---

“And especially so in regards to your buyers list, people that have already bought something, those are the people you should be especially strategic with.”

elBenbo’s Translation:

“I am so marketing illiterate I think my buyers list doesn’t want to buy anything else.”

---

“I think on your webinar the other day you may have said something about ‘reaching your potential’. Well I can’t help but suggest that your email strategy is far from optimised. At the moment it is complete overkill, there’s no way I can keep up so I doubt many others are.”

elBenbo’s Translation:

“Since nobody reads my emails, that means nobody reads yours either because projection.”

---

“In true IM fashion, split test. Duplicate a message list and space out the sequence and compare the open rates, the click throughs, the purchases, because in my humble opinion you’re not currently achieving your potential. Even though your earnings are impressive and significantly above average, I wonder what level it could be at if your audience wasn’t bombarded and inundated with emails.”

elBenbo’s Translation:

“My head hurts due to the cognitive dissonance between what I have wasted 10+ years doing and teaching and your outstanding results that contradict all my horse crap.”

Sheesh.

I don’t know where these cherries come from.

But, I do know they don’t come from me.

In fact, I do the exact opposite of what the fluffpreneurs think. And, so do my “Email Players” subscribers who are seeing huge results. Of course, if you want to follow the fluffers, play to not lose, and see a fraction of the sales you could be getting, be my guest.

Otherwise?

Check out how my subscribers and I kick bootay here:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

Today’s the last day to get your hands on the June “Email Players” issue.

Here’s what’s inside, along with the bonus I’m including:

• A screenwriting technique that makes it hard for people to get you out of their heads after reading your emails.

• Insights into how one of the most brilliant marketers who ever lived used butt ugly websites and plain text emails to sell a $997 eBook. (And without even offering a guarantee.)

• The “sharpen the knife of persuasion” secret of the great newspaper editor Horace Greeley that can make your emails far easier for people to read and buy from. (This is probably the best “writing” advice I have ever heard, and use it all the time in my emails.)

• How to make writing never feel like a “chore” and instead be something you eagerly looking forward to each day.

• The Disney movie method for banging out emails people look forward to reading and buying from.

• The “Get off my lawn!” email for getting tire-kickers who will never buy to leave while making everyone left over more likely to buy.

• The Gene Schwartz secret to making your advertising (emails, websites, direct mail, videos, and any other media you use) stand out in an overcrowded marketplace.

• How putting the entire “http://…” in your links can jack up your sales higher than pretty hyper links.

• How to “tweak” your product design and packaging to reduce refunds. (Dan Kennedy talked about how doing this made refunds drop to almost nothing.)

• How to get tons of testimonials handed to you — and without even asking for them.

• A real life case study of how a small town wine bar I visited attracts the highest paying customers while repelling the riff-raff cheapskate customers. (aAnd, as a result, only has to be open a few days per week to turn a tidy profit.)

• How Jerry Seinfeld used an ordinary wall calendar and a magic marker to become one of the highest paid comedians in history. (This is the most reliable and predictable way to experience mass success that probably has ever been invented.)

• And lotza mo’…

Again, today’s the deadline to get this issue.

Get it here while you still have time:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle