Ben Settle

So here’s the problem.

My ex-copywriting apprentice is going to the big Traffic & Conversion Summit in San Diego next month (which is good)… but, she’s going to be surrounded by homeless cats (which is bad).

Here’s what I mean:

She’s a generous, giving soul with her time and knowledge.

(The opposite of me.)

And, thus, when she first discovered her newfound copywriting and marketing “powers” she wanted to be a do-gooder and help people — even people she did not know — with free advice, tips, ideas, and, yes, giving away her time freely, without asking for anything in return. She primarily did this via hanging out in various Facebook groups networking and contributing to discussions. In one case, some bloke (who had never met her, or had seen any of her work) even asked her to JV with him in his new business, and they’d split the profits.

At first, she was flattered.

Then, I explained why she should ignore him.

The dude was a poser with nothing to offer and, even if he did, why would he offer her half his business if he doesn’t know her, had never met her, has never seen any of her work, or even knew she existed 24 hours earlier?

Doesn’t that seem a bit… oh, I dunno… suspect?

But, she felt bad for the guy.

(Again, she is a much nicer person than I am.)

So, she declined his invite, gave him some good advice instead, and then (figuratively) swatted him on the butt, gave him a cookie, and sent him on his merry way, thinking that was done and on to the next adventure.

But alas, it wasn’t so.

Like a homeless cat will do if you feed it just one time — he came back looking for MORE free advice, ideas, time from her, etc. (Specifically he wanted to know if she knew of a pirate site to download a $5k product for free.)

Shocking, no?

So once again, she dispensed free advice.

(Sending him to the sales letter so he could BUY it.)

And, once again, she thought this was it and he’d leave her alone. Of course, he didn’t leave her alone. He came back to burgle even more of her time and knowledge and ideas…

(She now ignores the hoser finally.)

The point?

To stroke my ego with “I told you so’s”?

No.

(Well, maybe…)

All I want to say is… don’t feed homeless cats.

Not just the ones who show up on your doorstep each night expecting a saucer of milk… but also the ones online who will come back again and again for more “food” (free time, ideas, products, etc) from you… and sometimes even getting hostile if you don’t give it.

Make them learn how to hunt on their own, instead.

It’s the only way to save them.

Here’s where to go next:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

Let me tell you a story.

A few months ago, my ex-copywriting apprentice (why do I like using that term so much? heh), accused me of being manipulative. Not maliciously manipulative, though. More like selfishly manipulative.

And, when she said why she thought that, I had to agree.

For example:

We were hanging out with some friends (a married couple) and they said they had to get going early. Now, I’m not Mr. Social by any means. But, I do like to venture forth from the elBenbo Lair once per week for a little… social interaction.

And, when I do, I expect everyone else to follow suit.

(It’s just how I be.)

Thus, I decided I wasn’t going to let them go home.

So I simply asked:

“Why do you have to go? It’s only 5:00.”

“We told our son we’d be home by 6.”

Now, their son is 25 but autistic, so you can’t necessarily blame them for wanting to go home. But, being the selfish little bastard I am, I pressed on…

“What happens if you don’t go home?”

“…”

There really was no answer.

Fact is, their son would be fine.

And they knew it.

I simply used a question to give them a vision of what would happen (i.e. nothing, he’d probably be watching TV). And thus, I gave them another option for the evening, which they were free to accept or reject of their own free will.

All with one question.

A question, apparently, I use a lot.

(Without realizing I’m doing this.)

In fact, my ex-copywriting apprentice says I do the same thing to her and everyone else when I want to hang out with people — despite them having more (so-called) important things to do. I say something like, “What happens if you don’t go now?” or “What happens if you reschedule your appointment for tomorrow instead, and we go wine tasting today?” or “What happens if you go with me to get some tasty buffalo wings instead of working on that job right now?”

And so on, and so forth.

The answer is always the same:

Nothing.

Life will go on.

I simply show them another option. (An option they prefer to the alternative, which my question gives them an excuse to do.)

The point?

I don’t know what the point is.

Except, when you want to manipu– er, I mean persuade someone to do something, take a page out of the world’s most feared negotiator’s (Jim Camp) book and ask questions that show them another option.

Don’t beg.

Or con.

Or lecture.

Or plead.

Ask.

Speaking of which…

The February “Email Players” issue is full of tips and advice for being more persuasive (not just in emails, but in your personal life) that are just as effective and, I suppose, unconventional as the tip above.

Where do you subscribe?

I’m glad you asked.

Go here:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

Recently, a friend asked:

“In the ___ space, for daily/regular emails – what would be a good open rate and click through rate?”

My answer:

There’s no standard good or bad open or click rate.

What matters is ROI.

Did it make a profit or not, and how much? After all, when you go to the bank to deposit your profits, the teller doesn’t ask “Sir, how many clicks and opens did you get?”

More:

I further told him if he’s pressed on this question again by a would-be client, to tell the person asking it depends on their list (are they buyers or freebie seekers?)… their relationship with that list (does the list hear from the client daily with useful and entertaining info or once per month with boring info or just blatant pitches?)… the client’s marketplace positioning (are they a household name in their niche or a start up?)… their personal brand (does the client have rockstar appeal or mere expert appeal?)… the deliverability of the auto-responder company (is it a reputable company or a start up with no relationships with the various blacklisting sites?)… and a bunch more things outside your control.

That’s just how it be, my little droogie.

All right.

End of sermon.

While there are a lot of things outside your control (the above are just a few), the one thing that IS in your control is how you write your emails.

Are they dull and boring, people ignore?

Or exciting and fascinating people look forward to?

To learn how to write the latter kind, go here:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

Q&A time…

“Ben, why are you doing podcasts?”

This seemed an odd question considering how much I’ve talked about this, and that I’ve had one going for nigh on a year now.

But mayhaps he’s new around here.

Anyway, here are just a few reasons why:

1. Audience building/bonding

2. Therapy (I get to let all my thoughts, ideas, rants, and brain farts out like air from a balloon)

3. Sales

Over the past 12 months several paying customers have told me they either found me first via my podcast, or that it was the combo of my daily emails and weekly podcasts that turned them to the Ben side of the Force.

Moral of the story?

“Why are you doing podcasts” is the wrong question.

The real question is:

“Why AREN’T you doing one?”

Hm?

Next:

“Ben, have you ever thought about offering a $1 trial into your email players continuity?”

For about .0007 seconds I considered it.

First, you already get a free trial.

When you opt in to my list, you get the first issue (in pdf, of course, not print). So a $1 trial is kinda irrelevant at that point. Especially since I pretty much only pitch “Email Players” 95% of the time to my list anyway.

Secondly:

I don’t like the price shopper mentality $1 trials attract.

It’s a great offer for software, etc.

But not something like “Email Players”.

I’m no interested in offering a $1 trial to my elite, high quality content than Rolls Royce is in offering its high end, players-with-money (as the late great Gary Halbert called ’em) customers a $1 trial. Like with Rolls Royce, you get a test drive (i.e. the opt in issue I give away). And while on that drive, you can go ye forth and use my test drive to make all the sales you want with.

(And many people do.)

Bottom line?

I want value shoppers not price shoppers.

Value shoppers play to win.

Price shoppers play to not lose — dipping their pinky toes in the water so they can decide if they want to stick with it vs chasing after some other BSO that catches their eye.

Nah boo.

All right, that’s it for today.

“Email Players” subscription info here:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

Recently I had a conversation with my ex-copywriting apprentice about the perfect kind of business to create if you suddenly find yourself without any income.

(Or are stuck in a job and want OUT, fast.)

A business that:

1. Has little (maybe none) competition

2. Has plenty of potential customers HAPPY to be pitched

3. Is an easily-reached market

4. Can be started for less than $30

5. Can pay you $100+ per day (easy)

6. Is scalable (meaning, once you get it going, you can start farming out the work to other people who need zero skills to do the work)

True story:

When I first moved to the Burgle last year, for the first time in years I found myself with having to clean up my dog’s poop. It used to be I would walk her to the beach or a nearby empty lot where she would let the hounds out (so to speak) all over the place and I’d never had to clean it up.

Now?

The poop piles up like lies in Washington DC.

I almost need *wings* to stay above it.

Thus, when my ex-copywriting apprentice told me her dad started a poop-cleaning business, I signed on without knowing (or even caring) the cost.

And you know what?

There are plenty of lazy dog owners like me.

(When I used to do office cleaning, it was the same, nobody wanted to clean their own offices, a lot of people have an even bigger hatred when it comes to cleaning dog poop.)

Okay, so how do you get started?

Very simple:

1. Go to the store and buy a pooper scooper and some doo-bags (bags you put dog poop in). That is your entire “investment” — less than $30.

2. Get a list of all the dog owners in your county.

3. Send them a post card offering to clean their dog poop — make sure you include a bold guarantee (“if you see even one smidgen of dog poop in your yard when I’m done I’ll double your money back”). If you are tight on cash, you can also post fliers on boards in churches, post office, go door-to-door, tell your friends, family, co-workers, etc what you’re up to, you can get business that way without spending a penny.

4. Start doing the jobs, get as many as you can on retainer.

Obviously, don’t quit your job until it makes sense.

But, it shouldn’t take long.

Frankly, even in a small town you can make out like gangbusters. If you charge, say, $20 per session (that’s what I pay, it’s worth every penny), and do *only* 5 jobs per day, that’s $100 per day.

But, that ain’t all.

After that, you can kick it up a notch:

5. When you got it down, farm out to local high school kids.

6. Scale at will to the entire county.

7. Put a site up and drive local traffic to it via AdWords, Facebook, direct mail, whatever method works best for you.

8. Collect emails from your customers and local dog owner traffic — start emailing that list dog-related information, affiliate offers, etc along with a pitch for your dog poop cleaning service, and any JV’s you do with dog-related local services (dog walkers, vets, trainers, etc).

9. Enjoy life profiting from doo-bags.

Yes its crap work at first.

(Literally.)

But most people are “above” doing it.

And because of that, your competition will be almost non-existent (assuming there aren’t already others doing it), and a ballsy guarantee (like the one above) will eliminate them, anyway. Plus, just by using a little bit of direct mail via post cards (dirt cheap) or knocking on doors and utilizing your network of local friends, and any organizations (church, etc) that allow you to post on their bulletin boards, you will clean up.

(No pun.)

Hey, nobody likes picking up dog poop.

It’s often worth paying someone else to do it.

And, it’s the kind of work where you can go in, do your thing, and nobody bothers you. You’re in and out, and can farm the work out to scale it.

And that’s it.

Want to make a full time income in just a few hours per week?

Then go ye down to ye olde pet store.

Get some doo-bags and a scooper.

And, follow the steps above.

Oh, and one more thing:

When you get to the email part, make sure you take a portion of all that green stuff you’re raking in and subscribe to “Email Players”:

www.EmailPlayers.com

You’re welcome.

Ben Settle

In this 1-year “Ben Settle Show” milestone episode we discuss:

• How to quickly position yourself as a leader (and not just another “expert”) in your market. (People listen to experts, but *follow* leaders, guess which one effortlessly attracts more sales…)

• How to remove any sales-killing desperation or neediness from your voice, writing, and marketing. (even if you really are desperate and needy for money.)

• A secret way (used by a few smart MLM and direct selling pros) of building a thriving income while still building your client base at the same time.

• What to do each day that’s almost guaranteed to give would-be clients zero doubt you are (1) great at what you do (2) reliable at what you do (3) the only one who does what you do worthy of hiring.

• How website designers can command sky high fees. (While all your competitors are treated as a commodity.)

• Dan Kennedy’s secret to attracting clients who are ready to hire you on the spot the first time they speak to you.

• How to use ezine articles you’ve already written to get overrun with new clients.

• The “leap frog method” for shortcutting your way to attracting high paying clients.

• The #1 mistake practically every service provider in history has made. (And how you can avoid making it.)

• The best kind of lead to spend your time selling to. (Focus on these leads only and nabbing new clients is as easy as catching fish in a small pond packed full of fish starving for the bait on your hook.)

• How to use direct mail lists to get tons of copywriting client leads handed to you on a silver platter.

• How to make yourself a celebrity in your market. (If you are seen as a celebrity in your niche, new business sometimes flows to you without even having to lift a finger.)

• How sociopaths spouting bullshit sell tons of products and services… and how to (ethically) use their methods to sell your legitimate services.

• A little-used way to turn FedEx into a source of quality client leads.

• And more…

To download it simply go here:

www.BenSettleShow.com/itunes

Ben Settle

Your command is my wish

So, got this question about getting clients a while back:

“If you were starting out FRESH and green TODAY – what would be your advice to me [to get clients]? ….. and if you have it in you ….. from the depths of your kindness ….. HOW would you do it?”

Yo command is my wish.

Checky:

Tomorrow’s “Ben Settle Show” podcast (our 1-year milestone episode, mind you) shows how ANY kind of service provider (not just copywriters, etc) can booked solid with so many clients… so quickly… you’ll have to have a waiting list.

A tall order, you say?

Hey, you be the judge.

Put on your black robe and wig and tune in to my show tomorrow (I’ll send you an email when it’s ready).

In the meantime?

Download past episodes here:

www.BenSettleShow.com/itunes

Ben Settle

So I picked the 3 Agora tapes winners.

They were the people who left the 3 best reviews for my new “Vampire Apocalypse” novel based on both the criteria I laid out (genuinely helpful, detailed, troll-free) and also some other criteria that I’ll explain in more detail below.

Fun fact:

I like to do review contests like this.

(For my stuff on Amazon, iTunes, etc)

So, if you like to win cool free stuff, the following will give you an idea of what I look for when picking winners next time I have a contest.

(And, I’m thinking of doing another one for my podcast.)

Anyway, on to the meaty stuff.

The first review winner is:

“FixesComputers”

Not only was his review genuinely helpful and detailed (without going into TOO much detail), but he fluidly and naturally sells the would-be reader on buying the book’s predecessor “Zombie Cop” as well. Which is not only genuinely helpful thing to do for the would-be reader, but is genuinely helpful to both books’ sales.

(If’n you catch my drift…)

The second review winner is:

Andy Moose.

His is not only genuinely helpful and detailed (and in a way that provokes just the right kind of curiosity) but he also urges them to get the sample and read the sample. Which, like the above review, is not only helpful to the would-be reader, but helpful to the book’s sales to boot.

And finally, the third winner is…

“Mike” from Cape Elizabeth.

His review did a good job of making the skeleton dance and using some good ol’ repulsion copy (urges the very people I don’t want reading it not to bother). Plus, I thought the Shrek analogy was perfect (not only because it’s Shrek, but because he got exactly what I was trying to do as far the novel’s various “layers” — as he puts it, “entertainment for the simple-minded, and inside-jokes for the adults).

If you want to read everyone’s reviews, go here:

www.EnochWars.com/vampire

Anyway, to the 3 winners:

Thank you from the bottom of my deranged little heart.

I hope you’re enjoying the Agora tapes.

Also, another thing to note:

I’m not a big fan of reviews that sound like they’re coming from a “critic” as much as just a regular reader. None of the 3 reviewers sounded like critics. They sounded like regular guys giving their opinions. And, that is another way I judge reviews beyond my original criteria (genuinely helpful, detailed, non-trollish).

Anyway, picking these 3 was NOT an easy task.

Several others were worthy of winning, too.

But, I said I’d limit it to 3.

And, well, why so serious?

Okay, moving on to something else:

I mentioned I will probably be doing a similar contest for my podcast (maybe even the same Agora tapes prize) to get more reviews for it.

And, you know what?

This email is a good guide for winning.

If you haven’t yet heard it, go to:

www.BenSettleShow.com/itunes

Ben Settle

Here’s the skinny:

Yesterday “Email Players” subscriber Neil Dhawan sent me an email about a would-be customer who disrespected his time (and, thus, him) during a call, and the email he wanted to send her telling her why he wouldn’t let her be a customer.

Below is the conversation thread between us.

(Including the email I suggested he send instead, which he did.)

Methinks he dodged a bullet.

Here’s the thread:

Can I please have your input on the following response I am sending someone – who I am denying being one of our customers. This is a tough route for me to take, and I would greatly appreciate your unfettered advice.

Thank You and Stay Amazing, Neil

*************************

Hello ___,

We have not received your email and, to be honest, we would simply delete it without reading your message for a very good reason:

We do not want business from rude and disrespectful people like you.

How so?

You called and spoke with me and I was quite happy to hear the benefits your cats received while using Geneflora for Pets. I patiently listened to your stories and inputted helpful information when you asked.

During our phone call – which was moving towards the 16 minute mark – you received an incoming call.

You simply said, “I have a phone call coming in.” and without hesitation, clicked over to take care of your personal call with complete disregard for my time and that behavior is unacceptable and will not be tolerated.

During our call, I let THREE phone calls go to voicemail, as I was respecting your time – addressing your questions and comments.

Perhaps in the future, when someone offers you’re their undivided attention, you show some class and do the same.

I’m not going to get into a long explanation, as you don’t deserve any more of my time. Knowing that you have access to a computer, you can order the product online. However, do not order from our website, as the order will be reversed.

OK, so that was Neil’s email he was going to send.

Here was my reply:

I would not send that, it comes off as butt hurt (I get where you are coming from, believe me, we’ve all had that happen) and will only give our gal ___ an ego boost.

Simply say:

We are not interested in your business.

Good luck.

And leave it at that.

Even if she writes back (and she very well may) begging to be your customer or demanding an explanation simply ignore her. you don’t want to reward bad behavior. And giving someone more of your time and attention by even writing them an email that is more than a few words is rewarding them with your time and effort.

It’s easier to find a new customer than try to fix a toxic one.

That’s my take on it.

Aaaaaaand, here’s what happened when he used my advice:

Okay, so I’m going to need thicker skin.

She replied with a tirade that began with: Thank you for your nasty, degrading email! There is no way I would ever consider doing any kind of business with your company again and I will make sure that others (pet supply stores, veterinarians, etc.) who might consider such, will definitely never do business with you.

More stuff in between …

And ended with: Maybe you had better go back to India!

Note to self: “We are not interested in your business” is nasty and degrading and not, in fact, as tactful as I first thought – though “Good Luck” was a nice little jab.

Thanks Ben 🙂

Let’s face it.

It takes one helluva rationalization hamster running on all cylinders to draw “nasty and degrading” out of the 9 word email he responded with.

And what’s with the “go back to India” crack?

Sheesh.

But, that’s how low class jackass people be. Why reward someone like that with allowing them the *privilege* of buying your product?

Let ’em haunt your competition…

Anyway, go here next:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle