Reader Kate S. puts in an application for an email topic:
“Ben, your personality and sense of humor come through so strongly in your email. I love reading them! But I wonder what you were like as a kid… Did you have any great adventures? Play pranks? Did you always know you wanted to write? I would love to hear some of your stories. I think they’d make great promotional email subjects, especially with your unique voice. Anyone else agree?”
I have written such emails in the past.
Like the time in 8th grade when Child elBenbo farted in study hall.
(The sound on the wooden seat echoed through the chamber, everyone started laughing and looking my way — so I looked at the guy behind me as if *he* did the deed…)
Or the time my mom broke a wooden spoon on my butt while I laughed at her.
Or the time I kept honking my my mom’s car horn to get her to hurry.
(Thus, breaking the horn… embarrassing the hellz out of her.)
Want another?
One for people paralyzed by fear of getting started?
All right, here goes:
When I was around five or six years old I sucked at swimming. I hated it. I was afraid of the water and thought I’d drown. So my mom made me take swimming lessons. At first I resisted. I’d pretend to be sick. I’d hide. When it came time to jump off the diving board, I even scaled the fence and ran away… my swimming teacher caught me, dragged me to the diving board, and threw me in.
And guess what?
I didn’t drown, didn’t flounder, and didn’t sink.
I *enjoyed* it.
So it is writing emails and selling.
Are you putting off writing emails?
Sac up and start writing.
Dive in, babycakes.
The water is just write.
(Yes, I typed “write” instead of “right” on purpose, Grammar Nazi.)
Don’t do what Child elBenbo did and hide from it, run from it, or scale the fence to escape it. Embrace it. Start writing. Today. Write an email designed to sell your product, load it up in your email broadcasting service, and let the hounds out.
Otherwise, you’re just being a poosy like I was with swimming.
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Ben Settle
