In which the question is “axed”:
“Hi Ben! I’m looking for a mentor online. do you do coaching?? I’m a newbie looking for someone like you to steer me in the right direction 😀 Thank you Ben! – Deena”
The short answer:
Negative.
Why?
Well, besides being a lone wolf who prefers working alone and not being responsible for anyone but himself… I’d be a dick to anyone I mentored.
Nothing personal, of course.
But I like to punish those who need the safety net of the coach.
(Needing a coach is anti-Ben at the core, not my bag.)
Thus, my “style” of teaching 1-on-1 would consist of me taking sadistic glee in making you do mundane, boring tasks for weeks on end while I collect abnormally large checks from you.
For example:
You’d have to fly to my town.
Stay in my guest bedroom.
(On the floor, my dog sleeps on the bed.)
And, basically be my slave doing things like:
- Scheduling lunches, meetings and wine/brewery tours with my local business partner in crime Trevor Mauch and our clients (of course, you’d be our designated driver)
- Washing my laundry
- Cooking my meals
- Doing my shopping and errands
- Walking my dog
- Helping Jodi (the gal who cleans my place) — in fact, you’d basically be her bitch, doing as she says, cleaning the entire place top to bottom, while she sits back and has a glass of wine, telling you what to do (you’d also have to clean the months’ worth of dog poops in my back yard I’ve lazily neglected doing since moving here…)
- Washing my car (wax on, wax off!)
- And whatever other domestic chores I could think of
What else?
During all this I supposed I’d have to teach you email.
But, it’d be grueling.
And, I’d expect you to keep up.
(Even if it means getting little or ZERO sleep.)
You see, I’d have you do all the things I had to do over 10 years of learning this stuff… but crammed into a week or two. Like hand copying entire copywriting books and long direct response ads. Writing 20 (yes 20) emails per day (what I did during my fastest “growth spurt” back in January 2011). Create detailed customer profiles on multiple markets so you “for real” get that the writing is really secondary (the market is first). Listen to select talk radio shows I instruct you to listen to (and take notes — which you will be quizzed on). Watch certain TV shows I command you to watch. Cease ALL carnal activity (i.e. no conjugal visits from your spouse, no junk food, etc). Read the exact books (including some that are over 300 pages) I instruct you to read… analyze one high selling email per day and think up at least 5 ways to make it better (I’ve done this, it takes sometimes HOURS, but you won’t have that kind of time as it’d take away from the domestic chores I make you do). Write me a personal email every day detailing why I’m so wonderful and how lucky you are to be doing my chores (so you don’t treat emails like sales letters, but actual personal emails).
And the list goes on…
There are many other things, too.
It would not be “fun.”
It would frankly be hell on earth for you.
And, if you showed even a SLIVER of sass, rebelliousness or complaining… the work load and suffering would get worse. In fact, the “beatings” to your psyche and work ethic would continue until your morale improved.
Still want to mentor under me?
I sho’ hope not.
But worry ye not.
I gots a better option:
The “Email Players” newsletter.
It’s my virtual coaching — done by paper & ink each month, which is the next best thing to me being there by your side, whispering in your ear how to write emails that bring in lots and lots of sales.
(Plus, you don’t have to wash my underwear…)
The December issue goes to print Monday.
It’s a perfect “jumping on” issue, too.
Why?
Because it contains 43 “types” of emails where you can open it up to any page, pick a type to write, and go to town.
But a word of warning:
There are no examples to “swipe.”
Nothing to cut, paste or copy.
(Otherwise it’d have been a 100 page issue!)
So you’re expected to think.
To apply it using your own personality and words.
And, to take it seriously.
Otherwise, get thee away.
Go here while there’s still time to get it:
Ben Settle
