“It doesn’t look good,” said the doctor examining his patient’s x-rays. “Everything is swollen except your wallet.”

Ha.

Got a kick out of that one.

Saw it in a comic strip in “Sun” Magazine.

I’ve rapped about “Sun” before in the hallowed pages of these emails. And about how you can find the grooviest headlines for idea-generation and inspiration.

Here are some from the recent issue:

Attack Of The Kelpie!
Teens discover supernatural horse is all too real

3 Easy Ways To Be Smarter

Herpes Virus Could Treat Cancer

Pollution-free, 90 cents-per-gallon fuel is a
MIRACLE AT THE PUMP

New Military Tech Lets Soldiers…
SEE THROUGH WALLS

What Do You Do With A 90 Fingered Robot?

Where else but Australia…
RUBBER SIDEWALKS FOR DRUNKS!

Duct-taped Airliner Forced To Turn Around During Flight
“The pilot could have been sucked out mid-air”

Real-Life Doogie Howser College Bound At Age 11

Townsfolk baffled by…
MYSTERY BLOBS FROM OUTER SPACE

Taxidermist survives 30 years on…
ROADKILL DIET!

Caviar Cologne Reels In The Cuties
“A dab of beluga behind your ear is all you
need to drive women wild”

ROYAL BLOOD
Prince Charles saves forests
in honor of Uncle Dracula

Never a dull moment with “Sun”.

Anyway, for lots of email subject line/headline inspiration, check out the “Email Players” newsletter where I include examples galore to learn, study and model for your own campaigns.

Next issue is a doozie, too.

It’s all about launching products with emails.

I just used my method to nab a 22% conversion (probably more, that’s a conservative estimate) over the holiday weekend.

It’s simple, fast and, yes, fun.

And it goes to print tomorrow.

Subscribe in time at:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

I’m quite bloated today.

Ate way too much last night and, frankly, I don’t even want to THINK about food today, much less eat, smell or so much as look at it.

But, I can WRITE about it.

And there’s a FAT email lesson within.

Here’s what I mean:

Feeling bloated after Thanksgiving has the same affect on people as sending them a large, content-packed email — you’ve filled them up, they’re “full” and still trying to digest your information for days in some cases, during which time they ignore all the other emails you send them (and are less likely to buy).

It’s like the supermarket cheese cube lady.

(The chick giving away cubes of cheese on a toothpick.)

She only gives you a TASTE of cheese.

It’s not nearly enough to get full so you aren’t hungry anymore. After all, if she gave you a POUND of cheese, you’d be far less likely to buy.

And so it is with email.

Most content emails are WAY too long.

I’m not saying long emails never work.

They can and do.

But just like you wouldn’t eat a Thanksgiving feast even a couple days per week and expect to be hungry (and not feel bloated)… you can’t serve the email equivalent of a Thanksgiving feast to your list regularly and expect them to be hungry enough to buy or not be so bloated they don’t want to even look at your next several emails.

Anyway, this email is getting a bit long itself.

So bottom line is this:

Writing pithy (yet profitable) emails is an art.

It rarely comes natural.

And few know how to do it.

To see how it’s done, check out:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

It’s happening more and more.

Someone skeptically subscribes to the Email Players newsletter, goes through the bonus “Email Players Playbook” that comes with their subscription, reads their first issue… then starts applying the info and seeing a nice sales spike.

Sometimes HUGE sales spikes.

Then cometh the question…

“Ben WHY does this email stuff work so well???”

Good question.

There are probably hundreds of answers.

Here’s one to think about:

Email (when done correctly) is the “oil” in your sales funnel.

(Especially when done daily.)

And it’s kinda like a giant machine.

It has multiple moving parts that keep everything going and if even ONE part fails, the entire machine grinds to a screeching halt. So in order to keep that machine going, you have to make sure you regularly grease and oil all the parts and you’ll probably never have a problem with anything rusting off or even going wrong.

You may need MINOR maintenance at times.

But mostly, it’s smooth sailing.

And so it is with email.

It’s the “oil” in your business machine.

Shooting out a daily email (again, assuming it’s written in the right way) keeps your sales “machine” functioning properly.

Keeps sales coming out smoothly.

And keeps the profits flowing like lies from a goo-roo’s lips.

That’s been my experience, at least.

What about you?

Do you want to learn how to keep your “sales machine” pumping out profits with email… with everyone wondering how you do it?

In just 15-20 minutes per day?

And while having FUN?

Then check out:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

I once got in a fight over sales.

No, not a FIST fight.

What I mean is, I was debating a person who was saying having special discount sales wasn’t very fair to people who had bought the product at full price, and that there was something unethical about it.

Like I told him…

He is simply wrong.

Take “Black Friday”, for example.

That’s supposedly the biggest shopping day of the year here in the US (the day after Thanksgiving). You can get HUGE deals on just about anything — clothes, gadgets, big screen TV’s, bicycles, whatever.

It’s quite the shin-dig.

But nobody ever gets mad at the deals, do they?

You don’t ever see “Occupy Walmart” protests with people pooping on the assistant manager’s car in RAGE at having special deals.

My point?

People buy when they’re ready.

Or when it’s most convenient.

Or, simply because circumstances dictate NOW is the time, even if they know a big sale is coming tomorrow. (Not everyone’s a price shopper…)

So sales can be mucho powerful.

They’re not the devil.

They’re just smart business.

And guess what?

Next month’s “Email Players” newsletter is ALL about how to do a kick gluteus assimus sale (or product launch, I use the same method for both) that brings in the dough quickly and in bigger numbers than you’ve probably ever seen before.

A bold claim?

Hey, the proof’s in the jello.

People I show this to make out like bandits.

If you want in on this info, go to:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

I’m a big fan of the AMC channel.

They have cool shows like “Breaking Bad” and “The Walking Dead”. And, believe it or not, they do something I’ve used for the last few years to create some seriously profitable product launches and special sales with email.

Something easy and simple.

And that gets exponentially more sales than normal.

Want to know what it is?

Well, I’ll give you a hint:

If you watched (for example) AMC throughout the day they launched the second season of “The Walking Dead” a few weeks back, you probably noticed a count down timer on the screen moving towards the time when the new episode airs.

It counted down ALL day.

And it was there constantly during all their shows.

Plus, they continually plugged the premiere episode in commercials throughout the day, too, so you couldn’t possibly NOT know about it.

The result?

Extremely HIGH ratings!

(The highest ratings for a drama in basic cable history.)

People couldn’t help but watch.

(Even if they had no desire to before).

Anyway, so there’s the hint.

It’s a powerful concept that’s one part of my email launch/special sale process (I use it for both) that has worked like gangbusters.

Not just for me, but clients, too.

(Plus, also friends I’ve shown it to.)

And you know what?

I’m teaching this in the December “Email Players” issue

And, I’m teaching it with a real-life example — with the entire process (and all the emails used) psychoanalyzed and handed to you on a silver platter so you can sally forth and do thou likewise.

But this baby goes to print soon.

To subscribe in time go to:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

Sometimes I’m asked about my favorite email teachers.

Who are they?

How can one get on their list?

And it’s amusing how many times people seem genuinely surprised when I don’t rattle off their favorite IM goo-roos. When they ask me “What about (fill in any big name goo-roo)??!!” my answer is always the same:

Yeah, so what about them?

Does that seem flippant?

I suppose it is.

But I almost always get my most profitable email marketing ideas from hardcore door-to-door or phone salesman, and very rarely from anyone online.

Take, for example, guys like…

    1. Stan Billue
    2. Barry Maher
    3. Jim Camp
    4. Frank Bettger
    5. Fred Herman
    6. Joe Girard
    7. Tom “Big Al” Schreiter
    8. Gerry Spence (not really a “salesman” but still…)
    9. Harry Browne
    10. Dale Carnegie

And the list goes on…

And even though some of these dudes are long deceased (and had never even heard of email) I usually am studying them and figuring out how to apply what they did/do in face-to-face or phone sales to emails.

True, not everything translates over.

But a surprising amount of it does.

And when I do learn something new, I’ll test it out, see if it works and then eventually share it with my “Email Players” newsletter subscribers.

(Not every issue, but often…)

Hey, just another reason to subscribe.

(In my BIASED, but accurate, opinion.)

You can read more about it at:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

Been doing lots of podcasts lately.

By that I mean, people have been inviting me on their podcasts to talk about emails and copywriting and other marketing topics.

And one question keeps popping up…

“How do I sell in emails without readers thinking I’m just trying to squeeze money out of their wallets?”

Interesting question.

But, methinks a bit… skewed.

You see the real problem here ain’t selling.

It’s people seeing themselves as money-grubbing marketers out to squeeze money from peoples’ pockets. That’s not a problem readers have, that’s a problem marketers have.

Alas, most people see selling as dirty.

Like a “necessary evil.”

But you know what I think?

I think if you sell something that SOLVES someone’s problem, then you not only should be perfectly comfortable selling (every day) to that person, but you have a moral and, yes, ethical obligation to do so. You ain’t doing them any favors keeping your product a secret.

In some ways, you’re causing them pain.

So hey, don’t FEAR selling.

Embrace it.

Enjoy it.

And start mastering it.

For how-to email sales guidance, see “Email Players”.

Each month I show real-life examples of emails I’m using to sell to various markets in a way you’ll feel warm & fuzzy doing (instead of like you’re some kind of evil con artist).

It’s truly an art & science.

And it’s yours to learn at:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

Sometimes people ask how FAST email really works.

Does it take a lot of time?

Or can you see fairly quick results?

Well, let’s put it this way:

Yesterday Email Players subscriber Jerry L. was saying how he recently needed some extra cash to buy a ticket to Washington DC for a martial arts seminar.

So he asked himself:

“How can I make the money?”

That’s when a light went off in his head.

(Your brain is groovy like that — ask it a question, and often an answer will come…)

He has an email list and some DVD’s he sells.

So he sent off 4 emails over the weekend.

By Monday morning he had raked in $1,500 smackeroos.

Not bad for 4 emails.

Best part?

He said the sales came in while he was watching TV.

It’s amazing to think about, isn’t it?

I’m not making you any specific promises.

(I cannot — and will not — do that.)

But one of my friends and I were talking about this recently as he was saying how his sales are now consistently coming in at around 5 or so per day since doing daily emails the “Settle way.” And he did the math and was saying how, if you sell a $29 eBook and sell just 5 per day, you make way more $$ (with way less effort) than the average Joe who clocks in at a job slaving away 8+ hours per day and 40+ hours per week.

(And that’s not even counting back end sales…)

Again, can’t make you any specific promises.

And you still need a good list.

(It’s not ALL email…)

But it’s interesting to think about.

To learn how it’s done, go to:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

So I’ve talked about “The Game” before.

That’s the blockbuster book written by Neil Strauss about the underground “pick up artist” (PUA) community. A fascinating book one of my clients had me read a couple years ago (he was toying around with helping a famous PUA sell his course, and wanted me to write the copy…)

Anyway, the whole game concept is fascinating.

And for some guys, much needed these days.

(However, that’s a topic for another time…)

But here’s why I bring it up:

One of the things PUA’s use is a tactic known as “bouncing” — where the guy takes the girl he’s gaming to multiple different places in one night, which leaves her feeling very COMFY with him, like she’s known the dude a lot longer than she really has.

And you know what?

This works like gangbusters with email.

This isn’t a “technique” I’ve consciously used.

I just always knew daily emails worked.

But the effect is the same:

When you send daily emails the right way, people feel they’ve known you forever even if they’ve only been on your list for a few days. It’s no wonder I sometimes get emails (even voicemails!) from brand new subscribers wanting to hang out or saying, “we’re like long lost friends, I feel I’ve known you forever…”

It used to kinda creep me out.

But now I get it.

That’s just what happens when you do email the right way.

The key is “the right way.”

Just lobbing emails every day won’t cut it.

You have to know HOW to do it.

And in the next Email Players issue I’m teaching how to write a special kind of email that can help your readers bond to you like super glue the very FIRST time they hear from you (with that bond deepening more each email after that…)

It’s a VERY profitable method.

And Email Players are gonna profit handsomely from it.

But there’s no time for dilly-dally.

This baby goes to the printer next week.

To get in on time, go to:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

Since it’s Halloween time, how ’bout a horror story?

Recently, I was talking to Doberman Dan about merchant accounts. Dan has been selling health supplements for over a decade, has an impeccable “money trail” record to look at as being ethical and transparent. And basically runs a business as honest as the day is long.

But, that didn’t stop ’em from shutting him down!

Talk about a horror story…

Imagine having your business running like normal, then one day waking up to dozens (maybe hundreds) of “declined” orders.

With no warning.

And no “heads up” whatsoever.

Someone at the bank decides your business is suddenly “high risk” (even though you have zero charge backs or complaints on file) and your business is effectively shut down… in the blink of a bureaucrat’s eye.

Yikes.

That’s scary.

(Don’t worry about Dan though, he’s a smart cookie, and in the next Email Players issue I’m including a bonus audio CD showing how he escaped that situation, and how you can, too.)

Anyway, where was I?

Oh, yeah, now, you may be thinking:

“But Ben! I don’t sell supplements. I sell an eBook — information — with nothing controversial about it…”

You think that makes you safe?

Forget regular merchant accounts for a second.

Even 3rd party payment processors that have been selling info products for years are following suit.

Take yours truly, for example.

I’m gearing up to promote a high ticket product with affiliates.

It’s a physical product.

And I don’t want to mess with paying affiliates myself.

So I thought I’d use 2Checkout.

They been around a while and are reputable.

Plus, I have even been an affiliate for info publishers who have used them to sell products very similar in content and price as my product.

But Saturday, I get an email that says:

(And I quote…)

“Unfortunately, we can no longer support sales from any website that would be classified as a direct marketing website by Visa and MasterCard regulations. This is a policy that has been passed down to us from our merchant provider.”

Application denied!

(Notice, their merchant account made the decision, not them.)

Again, you may be thinking:

“Yeah, but I use clickbank and paypal…”

So?

Who’s to say clickbank won’t do this?

Or even PayPal?

What makes you SO sure they won’t decide to ban selling products from “direct marketing” sites?

Fortunately, there IS a solution to this.

A very simple one, too.

And it is explained (in minute detail — I left no stone unturned) in the bonus audio CD that comes with the November “Email Players” newsletter issue.

It goes to the printer next week.

To get in on time, go to:

www.EmailPlayers.com

Ben Settle

BEN SETTLE

Publishes ridiculously high-priced books & newsletters about online marketing, writes twisted horror novels & screenplays, and trades options & invests in companies he thinks are cool – like BerserkerMail, Low Stress Trading, and The Oregon Eagle newspaper.

Yours FREE:

World Leader In

Email Copywriting Education

Gives Away His Best Tips

For How To Potentially

Double, Triple,

Even Quadruple

Your Sales Online

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WHAT OTHERS ARE SAYING

Even when you’re simply just selling stuff, your emails are, in effect, brilliant content for marketers who want to see how to make sales copy incapable of being ignored by their core market. You are a master of this rare skill, Ben, and I tip my hat in respect.

Gary Bencivenga

(Universally acknowledged as the world’s greatest living copywriter)

www.MarketingBullets.com

I confess that I have only begun watching Ben closely and corresponding with him fairly recently, my mistake. At this point, it is, bluntly, very rare to discover somebody I find intelligent, informed, interesting and inspiring, and that is how I would describe Ben Settle.

Dan S. Kennedy

Author, ’No BS’ book series

Ben is one of the sharpest marketing minds on the planet, and he runs his membership “Email Players” better than just about any other I’ve seen. I highly recommend it.

Perry Marshall

Author of 8 books whose Google book laid the foundations for the $100 billion Pay Per Click industry, whose prestigious 80/20 work has been used by NASA’s Jet Propulsion Labs, and whose historic reinvention of the Pareto Principle is published in Harvard Business Review.

www.PerryMarshall.com

I think Ben is the light heavyweight champion of email copywriting. I ass-lo think we’d make Mayweather money in a unification title bout!

Matt Furey

www.MattFurey.com

Zen Master Of The Internet®

President of The Psycho-Cybernetics Foundation

Just want you to know I get great advice and at least one chuckle… or a slap on the forehead “duh”… every time I read your emails!

Carline Anglade-Cole

AWAI’s Copywriter of the Year Award winner and A-list copywriter who has written for Oprah and continually writes control packages for the world’s most prestigious (and competitive) alternative health direct marketing companies

www.CarlineCole.com

I’ve been reading your stuff for about a month. I love it. You are saying, in very arresting ways, things I’ve been trying to teach marketers and copywriters for 30 years. Keep up the good work!

Mark Ford

aka Michael Masterson

Cofounder of AWAI

www.AwaiOnline.com

The business is so big now. Prob 4x the revenue since when we first met… and had you in! Claim credit, as it did correlate!

Joseph Schriefer

(Copy Chief at Agora Financial)

www.AgoraFinancial.com

I wake up to READ YOUR WORDS. I learn from you and study exactly how you combine words + feelings together. Like no other. YOU go DEEP and HARD.”

Lori Haller

(“A-List” designer who has worked on control sales letters and other projects for Oprah Winfrey, Gary Bencivenga, Clayton Makepeace, Jim Rutz, and more.

www.ShadowOakStudio.com

I love your emails. Your e-mail style is stunningly effective.

Bob Bly

The man McGrawHill calls

America’s top copywriter

and bestselling author of over 75 books

www.Bly.com

Ben might be a freaking genius. Just one insight he shared at the last Oceans 4 mastermind I can guarantee you will end up netting me at least an extra $100k in the next year.

Daegan Smith

www.Maximum-Leverage.com

Ben Settle is a great contemporary source of copywriting wisdom. I’ve been a big admirer of Ben’s writing for a long time, and he’s the only copywriter I’ve ever hired and been satisfied with

Ken McCarthy

One of the “founding fathers”

of Internet marketing

www.KenMcCarthy.com

I start my day with reading from the Holy Bible and Ben Settle’s email, not necessarily in that order.

Richard Armstrong

A List direct mail copywriter

whose clients have included

Rodale, Boardroom, Reader’s Digest,

Men’s Health, Newsweek,

Prevention Health Magazine, the ASCPA

and, even, The Limbaugh Letter.

www.FreeSampleBook.com

Of all the people I follow there’s so much stuff that comes into my inbox from various copywriters and direct marketers and creatives, your stuff is about as good as it gets.

Brian Kurtz

Former Executive VP of Boardroom Inc. Named Marketer of the Year by Target Marketing magazine

www.BrianKurtz.me

The f’in’ hottest email copywriter on the web now.

David Garfinkel

The World’s Greatest Copywriting Coach

www.FastEffectiveCopy.com

Ben Settle is my email marketing mentor.

Tom Woods

Senior fellow of the Mises Institute, New York Times Bestselling Author, Prominent libertarian historian & author, and host of one of the longest running and most popular libertarian podcasts on the planet

www.TomWoods.com

I’ve read your stuff and you have some of the best hooks. You really know how to work the hook and the angles.

Brian Clark

www.CopyBlogger.com

Ben writes some of the most compelling subject lines I’ve ever seen, and implements a very unique style in his blog. Honestly, I can’t help but look when I get an email, or see a new post from him in my Google Reader.

Dr. Glenn Livingston

www.GlennLivingston.com

There are very, very few copywriters whose copy I not only read but save so I can study it… and Ben is on that short list. In fact, he’s so good… he kinda pisses me off. But don’t tell him I said that. 😉

Ray Edwards

Direct Response Copywriter

www.RayEdwards.com

You’re damn brilliant, dude…I really DO admire your work, my friend!

Brian Keith Voiles

A-list copywriter who has written winning ads for prestigious clients such as Jay Abraham, Ted Nicholas, Dr. Stephen R. Covey, Robert Allen, and Gary Halbert.

www.AdvertisingMagicCopywriting.com

We finally got to meet in person and you delivered a killer talk. Your emails are one of the very few I read and study. And your laid back style.. is just perfect!

Ryan Lee

Best-selling Author

“Entrepreneur” Magazine columnist

www.RyanLee.com

There’s been a recent flood of copy writing “gurus” lately and I only trust ONE! And that’s @BenSettle

Bryan Sharpe

AKA Hotep Jesus

www.BooksByBryan.com

www.HotepNation.com

I’m so busy but there’s some guys like Ben Settle w/incredible daily emails that I always read.

Russell Brunson

World class Internet marketer, author, and speaker

www.RussellBrunson.com

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